Carlo's Table
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People-Family
Cappy |
Uncle Cappy got me
hooked on pool. I'll hate him forever. Or love him. I
forget. |
Daddy-O |
Genetically, I was
doomed to be a pool player so it is not my problem. |
Uncle Henry |
Never mess with a
cowboy pool player who owns a whip. |
People-Teams
First Las Vegas |
Our team's first
visit to BCA Nationals. |
Las Vegas |
Getting a team to
Las Vegas takes luck and a cattle prod with new batteries. |
Loot |
Dividing up Team
Winnings takes two CPAs, a divining rod and a quart of Jack. |
Double-Dipped |
The pain of being
Double-Dipped in the finals of a tournament. |
Perfect Team |
The blueprint for
assembling the perfect pool team. |
Signaling |
How to signal your
teammate that his shot selection sucks. |
EPPing |
When the other
team's habits make you consider becoming a mass murderer. |
Dusty |
Dusty, a teammate,
was murdered. I hope whoever did it burns in hell. |
Manny |
A great teammate
moves away because of work. |
PourHouse |
A memorable
double-hill game against the World's Best Pool Team. |
People-Strangers
Pros |
Man, I'd be a
great Pro pool player! If only I had the time, skill, patience,
determination, lack of other marketable skills, and didn't mind hustling
or sleeping in my car when things got tough. |
Life |
The Six Stages of
Life as an Pool Player will give you a complete understanding of the human
predicament. |
Haircut |
You can always
tell a great pool player by their haircut. |
Palsied Pete |
When bad health
stalks your game most of us will just hang it up. |
Stress |
What happens when
the 8 falls on the break, and nobody notices? Do I have to give up
pool and move out of town? |
Rotundo Raoul |
A very large pool
player has a tough day. |
Sweaty Hands |
No, I don't want
to shake your hand, come to think of it. |
Cuesports
Rules |
Next time I play,
I'm bringing a lawyer. Maybe two lawyers, in case one is a crook. |
Gambling |
Psst. Wanna
gambull? Ineedduh7. Honest! I've been sick. 100 a
set? |
50-Tips |
50 tips for a
better game of pool. Carlo divulges a fortune in free advice. |
Don't Worry |
Carlo cops an
attitude on a pool table, even with a friend and teammate. |
Slow Player |
Me? ....... I
....... don't .......play ....... slow, ....... it ....... only
....... seems ....... that ....... way. |
Sharking
Yourself |
Why wait for an
opponent to shark you? Get it over with by sharking yourself! |
Big Pockets |
Having a tough
time making a ball? What you need are bigger pockets. |
Equipment
Balls |
Why are pool balls
colored starting with yellow? What if women picked the colors? |
Junque |
Man, oh, man, is
there a lot of junk being sold to pool players. I think I have it
all, too. |
Cues |
One man's cue is
another man's herd of cows. Sure I heard of cows. Moooo? |
Tables |
Hey, moron, we are
playing on the same table, so get over it and kwitcherbitchin. |
Kling |
Johnnie Kling
designed my table after he retired from professional baseball. |
Kling Project |
What does it take
to refurbish a train-wreck of a pool table back to its former glory? |
Chalk |
Green chalk or
blue? Blue chalk or green? Red, mauve, gray, & puce make me
puke. |
Weird
Cursing |
Imagine hearing a
curse word or two in a pool hall! Is nothing sacred? |
Quilting |
Wanna make some
serious money? Take up quilting, not pool. |
Goats |
What the heck,
lets go grab a goat and make a game out of it! |
Look Out! |
Carlo is not the
lead sled dog when it comes to the Iditarod of Pool. |
Experiments |
Take some pool
players with too much time and money on their hands, add a fast camera,
and everything will make sense. |
TJ's Wonder Shot |
What happened?
How did that ???? |
Pool Hall Music |
Some music is
waaaay out of line in a pool hall, I'm sorry, but that stuff is crap. |
Little Otto |
Carlo has a
fistfight at 40. Carlo admits he is a complete moron. But it
was fun. |
Combat |
The Pool Rules of
Combat are not unlike words of wisdom for REAL combat, like with bullets. |
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Nobody paid me
any money to put these links here, I just thought they deserved it. Tell
them Carlo
sent you, maybe they'll buy me a beer.
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